About a thousand years ago (in fandom years), I wrote an SGA flashfic for the 38 minutes challenge. It was Ancient device genderfuckery called The Rose in the Worm and I never quite finished the sequel.


His previous veneration of them notwithstanding, Rodney was finding breasts surprisingly cumbersome.

They were awkward and in the way and heavy. Frankly, he was at a loss as to how women...managed them. He shifted his shoulders and winced as the rough texture of his shirt rubbed against tender skin. Teyla's near-constant refusal to wear one of these sandpapery bastards now made perfect sense.

He stumbled a little and had to grab on to the back of John's vest to keep on his feet. Stupid boobs. His balance was off even though he had trussed himself back into his own vest after Carson had made him remove it for his examination. And hadn't that been an experience in humiliation he never wanted to repeat.

Oh, Carson was his friend and as much a scientist as he could be in a field like medicine, but the breasts and, well, everything about this familiar/unfamiliar body, seemed to make even clinical touches vaguely inappropriate. Rodney knew he had impeded the scientific process by refusing a complete exam, but he knew himself well enough to know there was no way he could have gone through with it without running from the room screaming like, well, a girl.

Rodney tucked himself against John's back and peered around the corner. Empty. Good. John reached back for his hand and they jogged down the hall. They had been extraordinarily lucky so far; the hallways between the infirmary and John's quarters had been deserted and now that they were twenty yards from blessed privacy, he felt himself relaxing a little. The fewer people who saw him like this, the better. It was hard enough to browbeat acceptable work out of his staff. If anyone saw him like this, he couldn't imagine trying to get anything useful out of an incompetent like Kava -

Oh,fuck.

Kavanagh was coming out of his room, holding a roll of schematics. He automatically sneered an acknowledgement at the two of them and Rodney thought maybe the other man had overlooked the changes, but the obvious double take followed by a shudder told Rodney his future staff meetings had just become an entirely new type of hell. John hauled him down the hall and away from Kavanagh before either recovered enough to say anything, but Rodney could feel beady little eyes on his back until John's door slid closed.

"That's it. Kill me." Rodney began pacing in the limited space of John's room. "Carson was one thing; he's a doctor. And Zelenka, well, I look like an East German shot putter, so it's like a taste of home for him, but Kavanagh? It had to be Kavanagh, didn't it? I might as well - "

“Rodney. Focus.” John shrugged out of his vest and propped it on the floor next to the door.

“Right, yes.” Rodney took a deep breath and closed his eyes, trying to reign in his cascading thoughts. All he could focus on, though, was his body. Even his clothes felt wrong. His boxers were alternately too baggy and too tight in strange places and the vest he’d forced closed was what he imagined a corset to be like. It was hard to take a deep breath and as he stood there, he felt his breathing getting shallower and shallower at the thought of being stuck like this forever despite Zelenka’s claims it would only be a few hours.

“Hey, hey. Relax, buddy.” Sheppard’s hands were on his shoulders, shaking him a little, grounding him a lot.

“Sorry. Just – ”

“Freaking out a little.” His hands moved down Rodney’s arms a few inches. “You need something else to think about.”

“Yes, thank you Major Obvious. I –”

Kissing was familiar. John’s hands on his face and the feel of his perpetual stubble against his mouth was something Rodney knew. He knew John's moves almost as well as his own at this point.

Which is why he shouldn't have been surprised at the hands fumbling with the buckles of his vest.

"Hey! Stop! What are you doing?" He slapped at John's hands, trying to keep him from opening the buckles.

"I'm trying to - dammit Rodney! - get you naked." John slapped back at his interfering hands and Rodney was afraid this entire situation was about to devolve into a Three Stooges skit when the buckles gave up the fight and the whole thing sprang open.

Rodney would never admit it, but it was a relief to have the stupid vest open. His - the boobs had been a little squished. He let John push the heavy garment off his shoulders and he propped it next to John's. He pushed at John's shoulders, but the other man leaned forward for another kiss and reached for the zipper on the front of Rodney's shirt.

carleton97: John's having none of that, so he's got Rodne's wrists in one hand above their heads.
exitsign: we loves the wrist holding. guh.
carleton97: And John's free hand is just... exploring.
exitsign: The SQOOSHY BOOBIES!
carleton97: Yes, the boobies. Heh. And ove rhis waist and hip around to his ass.
exitsign: The wonderful ass. guh.
carleton97: and the whole time kissing. Lots of kissing. and panting.
exitsign: You know, I was thinking and I'm going to be totally honest about it, the ass should not be ignored. It might be the one thing that actually makes Rodney feel a little comfortable. Because that's, you know, not suddenly brand new. It's a little different and girlified but essentially the same deal. Also, the one-two of going down on the girl and then shifting and rimming her out is hot. And that's my honest opinion on that. Ahem.
exitsign: Kissing and panting are very good things, yes.
exitsign: ow. I just flailed and banged my knee on the table.
exitsign: desk, whatever.
carleton97: No, yeah. I'm totally with you. LIke he actually relaxes a little when John grabs his ass.
exitsign: yayful! The ass is Rodney's friend.
carleton97: Yes, it sort of mitigates the strangeness of rubbing against John without his penis.
exitsign: Ah, yes, good one. That must be weird. Being turned on and not having, like, his little buddy there.
carleton97: Right, it's just all... tingly instead.
exitsign: Tingly and wet and no hardness and it's harder to get friction and he really likes friction. Aw. Poor Rodney.
carleton97: And he's starting to get pissed because he just can't quite figure out the angle to do this, you know?
exitsign: Yes. I think they should undress soon. Because it's fun to fuck with Rodney just when he's gotten comfortable!
carleton97: Right. So he's moving all restlessly, trying to get some sort of rubbing that feels GREAT not just good, then there's a hand pulling down the zipper of his shirt.
exitsign: eee. I have the mental image of him being all 'oh, ye--ACK! NO!'
carleton97: Yes. OK. Like *yanking* his hands down and clutching his shirt together like some victorian maiden.
exitsign: ahahah. Oh, yes.
carleton97: And John is all kiss-stupid and 'the fuck?'
exitsign: Yes. Because he was going for boobies and there is no boobies for him and he is sad.
carleton97: OK. I need a moment of discussion.
carleton97: I think that, no matter how secure Rodney is in their relationship, he'd be having issues. Like, "What the fuck, dude? Are you just marking time with me to other boobies?"
carleton97: Or am I overthinking?
exitsign: Well that is definitely a thought. But... I think you should maybe ignore it. Because we needs the hotporn and, really, if he were to ask that question, it would probably hurt John at least a little and isn't something that John can really... give the right answer to. I mean, *we* know he's not but how can he say that? He's hard and he's horny and he wants to fuck his boyfriend who is sort of a girl at the moment and it's really a... 'you're just saying that so you can fuck me!' situation. Like, the same reason why no one should ever say 'i love you' for the first time during sex. Because there's the whole not thinking thing and the blood being elsewhere thing and the wanting to get off thing and whatnot. So I? Would skip it and just have some strange-but-happy, mostly-issue-free hotsex. Or(!) you can go with the issues and have massive amounts of yummy yummy schmoop -- it's your call, babe.
carleton97: I think I'm overthinking because, really, first and foremost, Rodney is a scientist and, really, that's all about experimentation.
carleton97: Because you know that if the situation was reversed he'd be ALL ABOUT John's boobies.
exitsign: Hell yes he would. He'd be all up on those babies. John would have to beat him off just to get a breath.
exitsign: mmm... John with boobies...
carleton97: Right. So issue free.
exitsign: OMG! Next time, you can be the girl. ahahah! my brain! saks;aASKLAjsl;ksaS
carleton97: So rodney is all, "ACK" andhiding the boobies.
exitsign: Yes. So how does John get to his fun surprises inside?
carleton97: Yeah. I'm thinking.
carleton97: It just got really smarmy and gross in my head. FIX IT!
exitsign: Um. What happened?
carleton97: It just turned all skeezy teenage boy, "Come on, baby. If you loved me, you would."
exitsign: ahaha. That wouldn't happen. Unless it was a joke.
carleton97: I know! I know. But it's in my head.
exitsign: I think instead maybe he just... gives him a look. Like a 'we could have hotseeexxx' look. Like maybe Rodney realizes that he's being ridiculous.
exitsign: Or something.
carleton97: Yeah. OK.
carleton97: So the shirt only gets like 1/2 way unzipped before more hand slapping.
exitsign: Okay.
carleton97: And, frankly, only good luck is holding it closed once John started to pull it.
exitsign: ahaha. They need AIR, Rodney!
carleton97: And John is all, Dude, wtf?
exitsign: Yes.
carleton97: And Rodney is all, "Um. Heh." and sheepish, but he drops his hands and lets John finish unzipping the top.
exitsign: whee! That's perfect!
exitsign: Yes. Faster to the hotsex we go!
carleton97: And you know how, sometimes, if you've got a front close bra on, it sort of... clings until it peels away?
exitsign: Yes?
carleton97: that's what the shirt does. And they're both looking down, just watiting for it.
carleton97: Because, yeah, Rodney's in his 30's, but the boobs, they're only a few hours old, so they've retained a lot more, uh, lift than normal.
carleton97: In my head, Rodney says, "holy crap!"
exitsign: ahahah. Yes.
carleton97: Like, that just seals the deal for him. I think he's like, well, hell, I've got this awesome rack, let's use it!
exitsign: a;laKSLSK;Asa;kss;ala'';L
exitsign: Oh, Jesus, yes. That's fucking fantastic.
exitsign: Yes. That's exactly what needs to happen.
carleton97: so he just fucking *tackles* John back onto the bed.
carleton97: No. Wait
carleton97: I want them standing to get rid of the pants.
carleton97: OK. So the boobs are revealed and Rodney says "Holy crap!"
exitsign: Which will never stop being funny.
carleton97: They both look up and their eyes meet for a second, then it's like this CRAZY MAD scramble because John is pushing the shirt off Rodney's shoulders and Rodney is trying to unbuckle John's vest and pull his tshirt off.
exitsign: OMG! YES! And in the background of my head, there's madcap movie!Lupin music playing!
carleton97: Hee!
carleton97: And as soon as the shirts are gone... Hm.
carleton97: What do you see next, because it could go a couple of ways.
exitsign: I have this thing for naked breasts pressed against hard, manly chests. So, um, shirts off and then grabbing and hard, desperate kisses, with John's hands on the breasts in question, and, like, holy crap, thumbs over sensitive nipples and Rodney has to twist his mouth away and suck in breath between his teeth. And, um, whoa, then you can ditch the pants. Maybe with one of those 'too much clothes' things or something. Yeah.
carleton97: yes. Perfect
carleton97: But I think the talking part of the evening is done.
carleton97: hell.
carleton97: They're both still in combat boots.
carleton97: damn you shoes!
carleton97: Always making porn awkward!
exitsign: hmm. Well, just gloss over the boot thing. Or you could have John undo both their boots and then do that thing where he's on his knees when he undoes Rodney's pants while Rodney stares down at him and breathes all hard. Oh. John on his knees, pants still on, Rodney standing up against the wall, his amazon boobies heaving like crazy while John pulls down his military issue boxers and just sort of stares. There's, in my head, a sort of bated breath moment before John's hands go sliding up his thigh, just kind of touching and exploring the new funplaces and then, um, the close-mouthed kisses to the hip and hands going up the insides of the thighs and up and up and about that time Rodney's legs, slightly shaky, shift apart just a bit and then the back of his head hits the wall behind him.
exitsign: Or, you know, something something.
carleton97: whoa.
exitsign: ?
carleton97: Yes. just like that.
exitsign: Oh, goodie! Points for me!
carleton97: Oh, hella points for you.
exitsign: I think there's one of those, um, tandem groans in there, man. Like, as that hand traveled up between his legs they both stopped breathing, and when fingers make contact for the first time, there's that 'holy shit' moment.
carleton97: guh. Yeah. sort of frozen there with the hotness.
exitsign: John because, you know, hot, wet girlparts. And Rodney because he's all super sensitive because it's the first time he's ever felt *that* before.
exitsign: mmm...
exitsign: See, girlparts aren't so bad.
carleton97: Right.
carleton97: God, I sort of like them against the wall.
exitsign: Do it then. Whatever feels right. You could always do a little something something against the wall, maybe let Rodney get his first fantastic girlie orgasm under his belt (ahah. under his belt.) and then move them to the bed. Or they could fuck against the wall. Or they don't have to fuck at all. Whatever they want to do.
carleton97: In my head, John is kneeling there and Rodney has one leg curled over his shoulder.
exitsign: mmmm... oh, yeah, you could do that. John would have to lift it. Because Rodney is kind of in a haze at the moment. I think fingers. Lots of teasing with his fingers before he finally pushes them all the way inside and makes Rodney gasp. Experimental tightening around them. Oh, guh. And, um, holy crap, yeah, maybe John leans forward and does a little tongue action, making Rodney go jelly-for-brains but he can't really *get it* just right. So he pulls his fingers out, looks up at Rodney, who is panting and all 'why why why with the removing?' and, sucks his fingers into his mouth. To which Rodney is very very glad he has a wall at his back because his knees almost give out. And then I think John is, like, you know, all cat that ate the cream and, um, gets him to lift his leg and, I think, just a minute of shaking knees and hands clenched tight into fists while he waits and John just *breathes* against him, and then we get down to business.
exitsign: So what happens next? We have John on his knees with his face buried in Rodney's crotch, eating him out but good, and Rodney maybe having a mild heart attack. Do you just want to do that with the story -- like have John jerk off madly while he does it -- or do you want to have him get Rodney off and then move it to the bed so he can fuck him while Rodney is all relaxed and shockingly(!) still horny (because girls are better than boyyyys!) and wanting more and, like, totally ready to play it like a team sport?
carleton97: second way! Second way! Learn the joy of the multiple orgasm, Rodney!
carleton97: Yeah. Like, in theory, Rodney understands that the female orgasm is different, but I'm thinking that the *practice* of it just wrecks him.
carleton97: Hee.
exitsign: Oh, fuck, yes, it does.
carleton97: because john's fingers are *there* and his mouth is *there* and it just doesn't stop.
exitsign: It's, like, rolling and clenching and every touch of John's tongue is like the most perfect slippery shock right to his brain ever. And it's even better when John starts making noises. Because, just like when someone is moans around his cock, he can feel the vibrations right up through him.
carleton97: And he can hardly breathe and he's not even sure how he's still standing.
exitsign: I think John would make noises when he did it. Because it's weird and so fucking hot and Rodney is just... wild. Like, he keeps making noises and so John *can't help it*.
exitsign: Yeah, totally, he's amazed he has legs left.
carleton97: But you know, John's knees are killing him and he's still in his pants, so eventually, like A YEAR LATER, he starts to ease off.
exitsign: Yes. Yes. He let's Rodney come down easy and then he's up on his feet and, ohoh, can they kiss? With, like, sticky 'I just ate you out, dude' face? That is so fucking hot. Rodney can go all crazy with the tongue down John's throat because that's *him* on John's lips and tongue. But not. But yes. But omgcrazybuthedoestastegood.
carleton97: you read my mind.
carleton97: And john pulls him away from the wall and he stumbles a little because Rodney has his hands TOTALLY down his pants.
exitsign: And then we have the backward walk to the bed. John already ditched his shoes right before he undid Rodney's so it's just his pants. Which Rodney is totally undoing as they go. I think, oh, more girlish hands on John's dick would be nice. Like, all the same callouses and scars and skin but just... different.
carleton97: The callous and scars are there, but the hands themselves are a little smaller, a little less broad,and a little more delicate. .
carleton97: And Rodney is fucking *licking* his face.
exitsign: Oh, *fuck*.
exitsign: Yes.
exitsign: Yes, *please*.
carleton97: and it's weird for *both* of them to just have on set of stubble going on.
exitsign: guh. Yes. But weirdly hot. Like all the rest of this situation.
carleton97: Yes yes! OK. John's pants FINALLY are gone and Rodney pushes him down on the bed, kissing and petting all the familar planes of his body. And when he goes to blow him, there's a moment because his mouth is just *that* much smaller, you know?
exitsign: ahah. The fact that Rodney's big mouth is smaller makes me laugh.
carleton97: Not, you knwo, a lot, just noticeably.
exitsign: Also, omghotness. He has to try to get used to fuller lips and smaller hands and a smaller mouth. He can't take as much or touch as much and it's a bit hard. But John is totally not complaining. In my head, he's on his back -- or, wait, pushed up on his elbows because he likes to watch. Only he's not watching, he's got his head thrown back and he's gorgeous -- all flat belly and perfect chest and long throat -- and Rodney just has to go at it that much more. Because John just did some serious magic for him and this is, like, a thank you. An unspoken thank you. Sort of thing. But I think John pulls him off all reluctantly. All '*gasp*Stop. Oh, wow*gasp*No, stop' and shit. Because he wants to fuck him. He wants to feel Rodney clenching around his dick and not his fingers. Wants to be inside him while he kisses those fuller lips that are, now, *even fuller* from sucking him off. Oh, shit, yeah, okay.
carleton97: fucking WORD dude.
exitsign: Okay. Okay. Okay, so John gets Rodney up off his knees(?) -- hauls him up for some more hot kissing -- and, um, does he pull him down on top of him for, like, full body rubbing or just immediately they switch places with Rodney on the bottom. Oh, HOLY FUCK, idea!
carleton97: ok
exitsign: Okay, what if? He hauls Rodney up and they do the on top rubbing thing. And then? Inside of John turning them over and fucking semi-missionary. We have, um, maybe Rodney sits back a little to breathe, they're both all 'ohguh' because he's all wet and John's dick is *right there* and maybe Rodney is all '...i don't know' in his head and he's going to, you know, get off John but John sits up just enough and he's touching and licking at Rodney's breasts and his hips are moving just a little and Rodney is in that 'eyes rolling back' place and it's all good. And... and... and it's on my list of top 5 favorite sexual acts ever! Riding! Girl-on-top! Oh, please, please. Unless no. But please! But it's okay if it's no! But please!
exitsign: hands! on! waist!
carleton97: Although, at some point, John does flip them over because he needs to *move*
exitsign: Yes. Yes. That's totally cool. Happens in real life so it works in fic. Plus, Rodney's legs are cramping up. He's not sporty, damn it. He can't do yoga. So John does the little flippy thing and he's all 'ohhh, bu--' and then, holy shit, not even a second of thought and John is sliding right back inside him. And it's all sweaty and fast and Rodney can't stop gasping and John is, like, touching everywhere at once and licking every inch of skin he can reach and Rodney just... *needs* to kiss him. He needs to (here's your issue in tiny format) know *right at this second* that John is fucking *him*. And so fingers in hair and John just shifts from sucking nipples to kissing in, like, a split second because *he* wants *all* of Rodney all the time. There's some sloppy kissing and then, basically, pulling back and rebreathing each other's air as they pant against each other's mouths. Guh.
carleton97: And John is so fucking HOT right then.
carleton97: He's sweaty and his hair is all floppy and his eyes are dark and soft and his face is red from exertion and his mouth is red from kissing...
exitsign: And what's crazy is that *that* is the first thing that's been normal for Rodney since however many hours ago when his penis disappeared and he grew tits. And that's, like, what makes it so hot. Because that's *his* and it'll always be the same no matter how fucked up everything around him gets and do you see what you've fucking done to me, Leah, this is so fluffy and sweet and aw, you're going to have to die after this.
carleton97: Rodney's basically been riding this seemingly neverending, low-level orgasm since the first sharp one from riding John. John's got one arm under Rodney's back and he's hanging on to his shoulder, absolutely no finesse in his thrusta anymore. His mouth is pressed against his neck, not purposefully giving him a hickey, but there is much licking and sucking. And he gets his free hand between them because he wants to feel Rodney come again.
exitsign: fucking guuh. And Rodney is just... he's so easy at this point. Atlantis could sink into the ocean AGAIN and he wouldn't even notice. It's just *insane*. His whole body is thrumming and John is just *covering* him and touching him, like, yeah, they have some good times but they've been doing this for... just... god, forever and he's gotten off, like, how many times now? And it's, yes, *insane*. So it's not really going to take much to get him to come again. With John's hand moving against him plus the erratic, crazy, deepdeep thrusting and he's just fucking *gone*. One hand on the back of John's head, half trying to hold his face against his neck and half trying to pull him up to kiss him -- he can't decide -- and one hand on his back, short fingernails digging in, and he can't stop the noises he's making because John won't even give him a second to breathe and he tenses up all over and then, bam, it's just like the fucking ocean has come pouring in on them and he's coming and, Jesus, yeah.
carleton97: Or! He pushes Rodney's hand down to bring himself off!
exitsign: Oh! Add that in there. Or whatever! Guh. Yes. Oh, god, can he tell him to? Can he say, like, something totally lame like touch yourself or something? But all fucking husky and fuck-voiced and fucking my spine just turned to jelly-making. Oh, fuck, I'm such a DORK but that's so fucking hot. Oh fuck. You know how I love that.
carleton97: Yesssss. because John really *can't* do anything at this point but hold on.
exitsign: Right. Yes. Guh.
carleton97: So pulls Rodneys' hand off his back and wedges it between them and is all, "Rodney, you have to do it." Adn then pushes his own hand under Rodney's back to hang on to that shoulder too.
exitsign: It's not like Rodney's ever, you know, *done that* before. But with John supplying some motion and, what must be, nature helping him along, he totally gets it. It must be wild to touch himself though. Has he, you know, checked himself out since it happened or is that the first time he's felt it?
carleton97: I don't kwow that he's had time, you know?
carleton97: Because I'm sure he FREAKED OUT when it first happened.
carleton97: Then there was getting back to the main area and to the infirmary...
carleton97: Oh. oh, GOD.
exitsign: heeee. Yes. Totally freakage. Along the lines of 'I HAVE TITS!! AJKSHAJKLJSLA! WHY THE FUCK-- OHMYGODWHERE'SMYDICK!!1ELEVENTYONE!!'
carleton97: Right, so Rodney's done this to women, of course, but doing it to himself was just different. It feels *so* *good* and oh, god, if he shifts his hand just like that, he can feel John sliding into him.
carleton97: And that, almost more than touching himself, is what sets him off.
exitsign: It's all slippery and hot and just... it feels good *all over* and they're so close and, God, John is fucking him and... and... yes, yes, fuck, that is totally what gets him off more than anything else. Oh, fuck.
carleton97: Oh, and even though they're done. Exhausted. Rodney is like, twitching with aftershocks. and John is still inside him, not getting pushed out right away and then they're kissing again and again.
exitsign: So, yes, Rodney is coming and John is? Caught up right with him? Or does he take a minute to appreciate the hotness of his boyfriend-turned-girlfriend clenching and coming and gasping and tensing under him and then, bangbangbang, come like two seconds later? And, yes, everything you said. The twitching and the kissing and just... yes, the perfect end to that hotsexing. Is that how you want to end it or do you want to throw in, like, them getting dressed to go find out how the machine dealio is going and, like, a funny one-liner ending or... what?
carleton97: Well, I like to imagine them going to meet with the others and, yeah, they've showered, but they both just look totally fucked out.
exitsign: Ohoh! Can Ford be there? He's always there to do that fabulous smirky snicker thing! That would be so cute. omg. Or not. But I do love Ford. Of course, you could have anyone be all smirky snicker, really. Lots of people saw Rodney before and, um, well, he's a *teeensy* bit more relaxed now. heh.
exitsign: (heeeeee! <3)
carleton97: Totally. Bwa.
carleton97: And like he starts to say something, but like gets a *look* from John.
exitsign: heeee. Yes! Because John would give him the look. I think, okay, crazy somewhat unrelated thought, I think, yes, John totally did want to tap it but maybe he also wanted to take Rodney's mind off how fucked up it all was. Like, he wanted to sort of... protect him from himself. With his penis. um. Or something something.
carleton97: completely. .
carleton97: I want one of the dudes in the story, when they're finally done, to be all, "OK, I'm dead now."
exitsign: OH! YES!
carleton97: Or Like, "Oh, fuck."
exitsign: Either. Both! "Oh, fuck." -- "Okay, I'm dead now." That would be brilliant.
carleton97: and they're both just gasping.
carleton97: Man. I just can't get the picture of poor Rodney stumbling back to the lab after.
carleton97: LIke he's got this GIGANTIC hickey and he can hardly even walk straight.
exitsign: mmm... because he's been fucked two ways to Sunday.
carleton97: yes.
carleton97: and he doesn't notice it because he's barely on his feet, but *everyone* is looking at him now. John wouldnt' let him buckle up the vest.
exitsign: Because John loves the boobies. And he knows there's no room in that thing for them. And he really just loves the boobies. The way they stretch the fabric and move when he walks.
carleton97: And he loves Rodney-the-Man, no question, but the boobies? Were a fun time.
exitsign: Oh, yes. And he will remember them fondly for years to come.
exitsign: Someone should take some pictures of him. "For the report" or something. heh.
carleton97: Yeah. If they wanted to lose their dick the hard way.
exitsign: ahaha. Totally true.
carleton97: good god damn, that is so hot.