ok, i'll play...

[carleton97]

If you had me under your command and could make me write anything,
regardless of whether or not I know the fandom or if anybody even writes fic
in that fandom and no matter how crack-addled it might be, what would you
love to see me write?


And this bit I reserve the right to steal any of these ideas that I
like, but I make no promises as to when or how or whether or not I even
will.

Comments

[exitsign.livejournal.com]

BUT YOU'RE ALREADY UNDER MY COMMAND. :(

Oh my god, what would I have you write if I could have anything? I should say something really fucked up, just to fuck with you. But no! That's cruel. Oh! I know. This is totally out of left field and really, like, really still pretty fucked up, but whatever! So, a couple days ago I was thinking, you know, wouldn't it be great if somebody wrote a NCIS/HP crossover where McGee was MAGIC. Basically, screw NCIS, MCGEE + HP.* Like, blah blah, young Timothy McGee post WIZARDRY SCHOOL has to go to ENGLAND as some sort of MINISTRY LIAISON and then... I don't know, gay sex, the end. It would be brilliant, shut up. Sean Murray saying shit like "Muggles" and "Alohomora" with that fucking bottom lip of his. ajkgshgdjhskjskj laughing forever.

Oh oh. Or, or this thing I just thought of because I'm so awesome. Bob/Joe, right? But no! Because Bob/Joe boarding school AU! Yes, it has to be a boarding school. And everybody's randomly old enough to be going to high school together. And also it's co-ed because I love Greta and everybody knows Spencer's really a girl. MAJA HOT EXCHANGE STUDENT YYYY. Anyway. So Bob transfers in the fall, his roommate is GERARD, who is CREEPY but turns out to be CREEPY AWESOME. All of Gerard's friends are like "YAY WE BE HAVING A BOB NOW" and it's all pretty okay and shit. Better than he expected it would go, anyway. Bob meets Joe through Ray because Joe and Ray buy pot from the same townie. They call each other by their last names, this is important because it's so overly masculine. "Bryar," Joe says, with a CHIN LIFT. "Trohman," Bob says, also with a CHIN LIFT. OH MY GOD I'M LAUGHING SO HARD WHAT THE FUCK. Anyway. So Joe starts hanging out a lot with their group, or maybe Bob's just noticing Joe more. You know, like all the time. Because he's hilarious and weird and really into music and also made of hotness. And it all comes to a head this one afternoon right before Christmas break when, like, everybody's kind of dispersing after watching Pete dare Dirty to eat yellow snow. There's some chatting, and it's all great, and then one of them goes into one of those temporary good sense comas for a second and lays one on the other. BECAUSE I LOVE WHEN THAT HAPPENS. And I don't know what else. But, since they're both going home to Chicago, they could totally hook up over break. And then some more when they get back to school. Teenagers! Making out on a fucking twin size bed! Both of them wearing school uniforms! COME ON. DON'T YOU SEE?

Yes, that is what I would force you to write me. Both of those ridiculous things.


*

[carleton97.livejournal.com]

oh. my. god.

Both those things are MADE OF AWESOME.

And the image of Gibbs with a wand is the best fucking thing EVER.

NO EVEN BETTER. GIBBS LEARNING ABOUT MAGIC. THE LOOK ON HIS FACE...

[exitsign.livejournal.com]

I'm amazing. You love me so much more than you love anyone else in the world.

AAAAAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHHHAHAAHAHAHH OH JESUS. Gibbs would shoot magic in the face. Gibbs would kill magic.

[carleton97.livejournal.com]

I do!

"No, Boss. Really. Magic."

"Get the hell out of the building, McGee."

[exitsign.livejournal.com]

AAHHAAHAAAAHAH OH SHIT OH MY GOD. WHEEZING. WHEEEEEEEZING.

[carleton97.livejournal.com]

"Look, this is my wand."

"It's a stick."

"No, look. Wingardium Leviosa."

"I don't care what kind of special effects you and Abby have rigged up in here..."

[exitsign.livejournal.com]

He would totally not have that shit. Tim could turn Tony into a rabbit and he wouldn't believe that shit. Gibbs stopped believing in magic when he was six and Santa didn't bring him a better name for Christmas.

[carleton97.livejournal.com]

Tony would LOVE that shit, though.

[exitsign.livejournal.com]

Oh god, he would. He would have SAUCER EYES. And ten thousand questions. Can you make me invisible? Do you have a magic broom? Do animals talk? Are vampires real? Is that how you got that fucking book deal?

[carleton97.livejournal.com]

And Tim would be exasperated but sort of charmed, "Yes. Yes. Some. Yes. Shut up."

[exitsign.livejournal.com]

EXACTLY.

Oh, I love NCIS.

[carleton97.livejournal.com]

And Abby would be all, *blinky blinky* "But... science?"

[exitsign.livejournal.com]

Oh, dude. Yes. Because none of it adds up. SHE WANTS TO RUN TESTS. She'll use the fact that he never told her as leverage. She feels so betrayed! He owes her!

[carleton97.livejournal.com]

YES!

And Ziva is all, *shrug*. Yes. We worked closely with our Wizarding counsel in Israel.

[exitsign.livejournal.com]

AHAHAAH FUCK YES! Oh, Ziva.

[carleton97.livejournal.com]

"Though I did not realize you were a Wizard, McGee. Very well done."

[exitsign.livejournal.com]

asjklasklj She's totally impressed by the fact that he kept that shit secret. She's really proud of his lying abilities.

I love you. Marry me.

[carleton97.livejournal.com]

ILU, Ziva!

As soon as you can get to Massachusetts.

[exitsign.livejournal.com]

I'd take a bullet for Ziva. No joke.

Hell yes. You're my one day, angelface. ♥